Tales of an Ex-Sales Douche -Introduction

I've been in sales over 20 years.  I hate salespeople.  That's pretty strong, I shouldn't hate people -I don't really.  I hate the tactics of salespeople.  I hate the agenda of salespeople.  I hate how salespeople are taught.  And I hate the unfortunately true, and embarrassing reputation earned by salespeople.
               
I love people, just not when they are salespeople.  It's hard to find a salesperson that doesn't seem like a salesperson.  Which is the ultimate way to be as a sales person.

I love what I do.  I love teaching, inspiring, improving people's lives, serving. That is the definition of a real salesperson.  

The challenge begins when
a person takes a position for the sake of being employed, the purpose of (only) making money, and sees the clients as an opportunity.  That agenda is what we see pouring out of the suits of so many impostors.  You know, like this...

     You've met him.  I run.










Or how about the "professional" who prides himself (or herself of course) on being the epitome of the stereotype.  They really believe that there is a certain personality, demeanor, that goes with being successful in sales, and THEY. ARE. IT.  They think Let me show you how it is done! They do "it", the fake, creepy, over enthusiastic, I-have-an-amazingly-positive-personality-you-wont-be-able-to-resist mindset, to such a degree that scares the bejesus out of people.  But you endure it because you think you have no choice.  You think that is how we all are.  It's so sad.  In case you run into him, let me warn you by showing you what he looks like too...

  Ack










Sales is an honorable profession.  It's one of the most difficult endeavors to take on, yet the must rewarding, as it exposes all your flaws and demands repair. I feel I must avenge it.

I also must confess I've done some pretty douchy things myself, woke up along the way, threw up, and then started to clean up the mess I had left behind me.  I declared at one point to never leave another dead body in my wake.

On the scale of douchiness, I am very much one of the good guys (gal), and hope that being a small douche instead of a big douche might somehow make me feel better. You can judge through some of the stories I am going to tell you in this series.  But I cannot exclude myself and looking back I am clear why all of my mishaps were born.  I will humbly expose myself for the greater good of all aspiring sales people (that doesn't exist, we are all mistakes, but of the Reese's kind).

And what a wonderful mistake it was, bringing me to where I am now.  My business is one that most wish they had.  I have not made millions, and am not of a business celebrity status, but I have acquired something that is quite evasive.  I have a large client base that loves me, thrives, and affords me freedom with the passive income it generates.

These are my tales.  Through them I hope to make you laugh, cry, think, think harder, get better, and rise to the heights you always knew possible.  Most of all, I will teach you how to reach Ex-Sales Douche status.



Always Yours,


A Recovered Sales Douche


Stay tunes for post #1 of Tales of an Ex-Sales Douche.  And let me know in the comments what ridiculous things you have encountered in your sales travels!